Showing posts with label religion. Show all posts
Showing posts with label religion. Show all posts

Monday, April 7, 2014

The Resurrection, Too Good Not To Pass On!

Here is a quick funny joke that I recently found in my Email Inbox. It may offend some because it plays on a very important religious precept. If you know that you become offended at this kind of humor, please check out another post here, or visit another site. Thanks!

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While the priest was presenting a children's sermon,
He asked the children if they knew what the Resurrection was.

Now, asking questions during children's sermons is crucial, but at the same time, asking children questions in front of a congregation can also be very dangerous. In response to the question, a little boy raised his hand.

The priest called on him and the boy said,

"I know that if you have a resurrection that lasts more than four hours you are supposed to call the doctor."

It took ten minutes for the congregation to settle down enough for the service to continue.

Monday, March 3, 2014

Are You a True Christian?

OH, HOW IMPORTANT TO WALK THE WALK & NOT JUST TALK THE TALK !!!!!!!

The light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.

The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration, as she missed her chance to get through the intersection, dropping her cell phone and makeup.

As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up..

He took her to the police station where she was searched, fingerprinted, photographed, and placed in a holding cell.

After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects.

He said, "I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the 'What Would Jesus Do' bumper sticker, the 'Choose Life' license plate holder, the 'Follow Me to Sunday-School' bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk. So naturally, I assumed you had stolen the car."

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

New Christmas Stamp - Not Really

Here's an email I got a few days ago.  It's about a new Muslim Christmas stamp.  Sounds strange, right? Well here is the email, and then I'll comment.

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They don’t believe in Christ but get their own Christmas stamp. What is happening to us?

BUYING STAMPS?

Kaleidoscope Flowers StampsDon't buy this stamp! It is pretty, but keep reading! Will be available November 1, 2013

President Obama has directed the United States Postal Service to remember and honor the EID Muslim holiday season with a new commemorative 46 Cent First Class Holiday Postage Stamp.

The new stamp is the second MUSLIM stamp, and celebrates a Muslim holiday!

If there is only ONE thing you Forward today, let it be this
!
REMEMBER to adamantly BOYCOTT this stamp when you purchase stamps anywhere. All you have to say is, "No thank you, I do not want a Muslim stamp on my letters!"

Buy our US flag stamp instead, please!

Pass this along to every Patriotic American you know and get the word out!
Honor the United States of America


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Yes, it's fine to honor the USA.  We have freedom of choice here, so put whatever stamp you like on your cards and letters.  But don't believe what this email says about this particular stamp!

It is a Kaleidoscope Flowers Stamp and you can read all about it on this United States Postal Service web page: http://about.usps.com/news/national-releases/2013/pr13_002.htm. It has nothing to do with any religion.

Snopes says that there is an EID stamp, which celebrates the Muslim holiday of EID and not Christmas, but you have to ask for it since it is generally a specialty item.  Read the snopes article on this email, here: http://www.snopes.com/politics/stamps/eidstamp.asp

Bottom Line - Don't believe everything you get in emails or read on the internet.  Research for yourself and make up your own mind on all issues, large and small.

 

Monday, July 1, 2013

How Asparagus got it's name - A Kid's Bible Essay - Funny!

A sixth grade child was asked to write a book report on the entire Bible.
Here is what he wrote;

The Children's Bible in a Nutshell

In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God, darkness, and some gas. The Bible says,
"The Lord thy God is one," but I think He must be a lot older than that.

Anyway, God said, "Give me a light!" and someone did.

Then God made the world.

He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam and Eve were naked, but they weren't embarrassed because mirrors hadn't been invented yet.

Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden ... Not sure what they were driven in though, because they didn't have cars.

Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel. Pretty soon all of the early people died off, except for Methuselah, who lived to be like a million or something.

One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy, but one of his kids was kind of a Ham. Noah built a large boat and put his family and some animals on it. He asked some other people to join him, but they said they would have to take a rain check.

After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jacob was more famous than his brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his birthmark in exchange for some pot roast. Jacob had a son named Joseph who wore a really loud sports coat.

Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was Charlton Heston. Moses led the Israel Lights out of
Egypt and away from the evil Pharaoh after God sent ten plagues on Pharaoh's people. These plagues included frogs, mice, lice, bowels, and no cable.

God fed the Israel Lights every day with manicotti. Then he gave them His Top Ten Commandments. These include: don't lie, cheat, smoke, dance, or covet your neighbor's stuff.

Oh, yeah, I just thought of one more: Humor thy father and thy mother.

One of Moses' best helpers was Joshua who was the first Bible guy to use spies. Joshua fought the battle of Geritol and the fence fell over on the town.

After Joshua came David. He got to be king by killing a giant with a slingshot. He had a son named Solomon who had about 300 wives and 500 porcupines. My teacher says he was wise, but that doesn't sound very wise to me.

After Solomon there were a bunch of major league prophets. One of these was Jonah, who was swallowed by a big whale and then barfed up on the shore.

There were also some minor league prophets, but I guess we don't have to worry about them.

After the Old Testament came the New Testament. Jesus is the star of The New Testament. He was born in
Bethlehem in a barn. (I wish I had been born in a barn too, because my mom is always saying to me, "Close the door! Were you born in a barn?" It would be nice to say, ''As a matter of fact, I was.'')

During His life, Jesus had many arguments with sinners like the Pharisees and the Republicans. Jesus also had twelve opossums. The worst one was Judas Asparagus. Judas was so evil that they named a terrible vegetable after him.

Jesus was a great man. He healed many leopards and even preached to some Germans on the Mount. But the Democrats and all those guys put Jesus on trial before Pontius the Pilot. Pilot didn't stick up for Jesus. He just washed his hands instead.

Anyways, Jesus died for our sins, then came back to life again. He went up to Heaven but will be back at the end of the Aluminum. His return is foretold in the book of Revolution.

(Nothing bad will happen if you don't forward this, but if you do forward this delightful story you'll make someone LAUGH today, and they'll keep spreading the laughter by sending it on!!)

Friday, June 15, 2012

Grandma still drives!


Clueless Grandma still drives!  FUNNY!  
 

Grandma is eighty-eight years old and still drives her own car.
She writes:

Dear Grand-daughter,
The other day I went up to our local Christian book store and saw a
'Honk if you love Jesus' bumper sticker.

I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from
a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer
meeting..

So, I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper.

Boy, am I glad I did; what an uplifting experience that followed.

I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in
thought about the Lord and how good he is, and I didn't notice that the
light had changed.

It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn't
honked, I'd never have noticed.

I found that lots of people love Jesus!

While I was sitting there, the guy behind started honking like crazy,
and then he leaned out of his window and screamed, 'For the love of
God!'

'Go! Go! Go! Jesus Christ, GO!'

What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus!

Everyone started honking!

I just leaned out my window and started waving and smiling at all those
loving people.

I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love!

There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him
yelling something about a sunny beach.

I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger
stuck up in the air.

I asked my young teenage grandson in the back seat what that meant.

He said it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something.

Well, I have never met anyone from Hawaii , so I leaned out the window
and gave him the good luck sign right back.

My grandson burst out laughing.

Why even he was enjoying this religious experience!!

A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that
they got out of their cars and started walking towards me.

I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended, but this is
when I noticed the light had changed.

So, grinning, I waved at all my brothers and sisters, and drove on
through the intersection.

I noticed that I was the only car that got through the intersection
before the light changed again and felt kind of sad that I had to leave
them after all the love we had shared.

So I slowed the car down, leaned out the window and gave them all the
Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away. Praise the Lord
for such wonderful folks!!

Will write again soon,

Love, Grandma

Thursday, March 24, 2011

WHAT CAUSES ARTHRITIS?

A drunk man, who smelled of liquor, sat down on a subway next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half-empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his coat pocket.. He opened his newspaper and began reading.

After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked, 'Say Father, do you know what causes arthritis?'

The priest replies, 'My Son, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, contempt for your fellow man, sleeping around with prostitutes and lack of a bath.'

The drunk muttered in response, 'Well, I'll be damned.' Then he returned to his paper.

The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized. 'I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?'



The drunk answered, 'I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does.'

Monday, August 16, 2010

The Lord's Ballgame

Here is a religious email that has been circulating. After the cute Baseball analogy, it proffers:

The Lord explained, 'If your love, faith and wisdom had won the game, you would think you had done it by yourself. Love, Faith and Wisdom will get you on base but only My Grace can get you Home:

'For by Grace are you saved, it is a gift of God; not of works, lest any man should boast.' Ephesians 2:8-9

Psalm 84:11, 'For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord will give grace and glory; no good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly.'

This seems to play both sides of the long existing debate between predestination and free will. This point is a major difference between Protestant denominations. Calvanists and others believe in predestination and support their belief with verses such as Romans 9 and the Ephesians verse in this email. Most other denominations believe in free will and offer verses such as the famous John 3:16 as proof.

Predestination says God decided before anyone was born who will be saved and go to heaven, and who will be damned and go to hell. Free will states that we have the choice to choose to believe in Jesus (faith) and go to heaven, or not.

What does this email say? First it says you won't get to heaven by faith, only by God's grace. Then it says that if you walk upright, which takes work, God will not withhold any good thing from you, and surely heaven is the greatest good thing!

Which is it? Can we get to heaven by walking upright (living a good life) or can we only get there if God has already decided that He is going to bestow grace on us regardless of how much love, wisdom or faith we have?



The email concludes with:

'I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.'
Phil 4:13

"ALL" things?

He said to them, “Because of your little faith. For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.”
—Matthew 17:20


Truly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven.
—Matthew 18:18-19

And Jesus answered them, “Truly, I say to you, if you have faith and do not doubt, you will not only do what has been done to the fig tree, but even if you say to this mountain, ‘Be taken up and thrown into the sea,’ it will happen.
—Matthew 21:21

Anyone seen mountains move around lately? Anyone prayed earnestly with a group and discovered your request left undone?

Read more in this article:
Should we take the Bible literally?

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THE LORD'S BASEBALL GAME

Freddy and the Lord stood by to observe a baseball game. The Lord's team was playing Satan's team.

The Lord's team was at bat, the score was tied zero to zero, and it was the bottom of the 9th inning with two outs. They continued to watch as a batter stepped up to the plate named 'Love.'

Love swung at the first pitch and hit a single, because 'Love never fails.'

The next batter was named Faith, who also got a single because Faith works with Love.

The next batter up was named Godly Wisdom. Satan wound up and threw the first pitch.

Godly Wisdom looked it over and let it pass: Ball one. Three more pitches and Godly Wisdom walked because he never swings at what Satan throws.

The bases were now loaded. The Lord then turned to Freddy and told him He was now going to bring in His starplayer. Up to the plate stepped Grace. Freddy said, 'He sure doesn't look like much!'

Satan's whole team relaxed when they saw Grace.

Thinking he had won the game, Satan wound up and fired his first pitch. To the shock of everyone, Grace hit the ball harder than anyone had ever seen! But Satan was not worried; his center fielder let very few get by.

He went up for the ball, but it went right through his glove, hit him on the head and sent him crashing on the ground; the roaring crowds went wild as the ball
continued over the fence . . for a home run!

The Lord's team won!

The Lord then asked Freddy if he knew why Love, Faith and Godly Wisdom could get on base but couldn't win the game. Freddy answered that he didn't know why.

The Lord explained, 'If your love, faith and wisdom had won the game, you would think you had done it by yourself. Love, Faith and Wisdom will get you on base but only My Grace can get you Home:

'For by Grace are you saved, it is a gift of God; not of works, lest any man should boast.' Ephesians 2:8-9

Psalm 84:11, 'For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord will give grace and glory; no good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly.'

I do Love God. He is my source of existence and Savior. He keeps me functioning each and everyday. Without Him, I am nothing, but with him:

'I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.'
Phil 4:13

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

If you think our country is not in trouble, think again...


Here's an email that's going around lately. It seems to be a mix of fact and fiction. Research, then decide for yourself!

Obama didn't declared that the USA was no longer a Christian nation - he said that the USA was no longer JUST a Christian nation.

Obama didn't cancel the National Day of Prayer Ceremony - he recognized the National Day of Prayer with a paper proclamation instead of a public event at the White House.

There was a Muslin rally in D.C. bit it wasn't a replacement for the National Day of Prayer.


http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2009/05/06/obamas-decision-observe-national-day-prayer-privately-draws-public-criticism/

http://urbanlegends.about.com/od/religion/a/islam_on_capitol_hill.htm

http://www.snopes.com/politics/obama/prayerday.asp

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In
1952
President Truman
Established one day a year as a "National Day of Prayer."
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In
1988 President Reagan
designated the First Thursday in May of each year as
the National Day of Prayer.
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In June
2007 (then)
Presidential Candidate Barack Obama
declared that the USA Was no longer a Christian nation.

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This year President Obama
canceled the 21st annual National Day
of Prayer ceremony
at the White House under the ruse Of "not wanting to offend anyone"

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On September 25, 2009
from 4 am until 7 pm,
a National Day of Prayer
for the Muslim religion was Held on Capitol Hill, Beside the White House.
There were over 50,000 Muslims that Day in D.C.
HE PRAYS WITH THE MUSLIMS!

I guess it Doesn't matter
if "Christians" Are offended by this event - We obviously Don't count as
"anyone" Anymore. The direction this country is headed should strike fear in the heart of every Christian, especially knowing that the Muslim religion believes that if Christians cannot be converted, they should be annihilated. This is not a Rumor?
Go to the website To confirm this info:
http://www.islamoncapitolhill.com/

Pay particular attention to the very bottom of the page: "OUR TIME HAS COME" I hope that this information will stir your spirit.
The words of 2 Chronicles 7:14 "If my people, Who are called by my Name, Will humble themselves And pray, And seek my face, and Turn from their Wicked ways, Then will I hear from Heaven And will forgive their Sin and will heal Their land." We must pray for Our nation, our communities, Our families, and especially our children. They are the ones who are going to suffer the most.. If we don't PRAY May God have Mercy.
IN GOD WE TRUST. Please pass this on.

Maybe someone, somehow can figure out a way to put America
back on the map as it was when we were growing up,
a safe place to live, and by The Ten Commandments and Pledge of Allegiance.
For Obama to continue as our president
is an INSULT TO OUR FOUNDING FATHERS
AND DISGUSTING TO EVERY RED-BLOODED AMERICAN.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Dr. Dobson & CBS Reporter

Here's another email going around that, according to Snopes, is FALSE!

Read all about it: http://www.snopes.com/politics/religion/fcc.asp

Religion Articles at LFCPlease read our articles on Religion at LookingForClues. Thanks!



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Dr. Dobson & CBS Response

Apparently we are to be allowed to watch TV
programs that use every foul word in the English
language, but not the word 'God.' It will only
take a minute to read this and see if you think
you should send it out.


DR. DOBSON'S PLEA FOR ACTION

CBS discontinued 'Touched by an Angel' for using
the word God in every program. Madelin e Murray
O'Hare, an atheist, successfully managed to
eliminate the use of Bible reading from public
schools a few years ago.

Now her organization has been granted a federal
hearing on the same subject by the Federal
Communications Commission (FCC) Washington, DC.

Their petition, Number 2493, would ultimately pave
the way to stop the reading of the gospel, our Lord
and Savior, on the airwaves of America.

They got 287,000 signatures to back their stand!
If this attempt is successful, all Sunday worship
services being broadcast on the radio or by
television will be stopped. This group is also
campaigning to remove all Chrismas programs and
Christmas carols from public schools!

You as a Christian can help!

We are praying for at least 1 million signatures. This would
defeat their effort and show that there are many Christians
alive, well and concerned about our country. As Christians
we must unite on this. Please don't take this lightly.

We ignored this lady once and lost prayer in our
school and in offices across the nation.

Please stand up for your religious freedom and let
your voice be heard. Together we can make a
difference in our country while creating a way for
the lost to know the Lord.

Please press 'forward', and forward this to
everyone that you think should read this.
Now, please sign your name at the bottom ( you
can only add your name after you have pressed the
'Forward').

Don't delete any other names, just go to the next
number and type your name and state. Please defeat this
organization and keep the right of our freedom of religion.

REMEMBER: Our country was founded on freedom of religion
and our Constitution is based on the 10 Commandments.

Agree or Delete: Instructions to sign are at the bottom.

PETITION FOR PRESIDENT BUSH
(names omitted!)

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Sunday, April 27, 2008

7 Percent

A Holy man was having a conversation with the Lord one day and said.
"Lord, I would like to know what Heaven and Hell are like."

The Lord led the Holy man to two doors. He opened one of the doors
and the Holy man looked in. In the middle of the room was a large
round table. In the middle of the table was a large pot of stew, which
smelled delicious and made the Holy man's mouth water.

The people sitting around the table were thin and sickly. They
appeared to be famished. They were holding spoons with very long
handles that were strapped to their arms and each found it possible to
reach into the pot of stew and take a spoonful.

But because the handle was longer than their arms, they could not
get the spoons back into their mouths. The Holy man shuddered at the
sight of their misery and suffering.

The Lord said, "You have seen Hell."

They went to the next room and opened the door. It was exactly the
same as the first one. There was the large round table with the large
pot of stew which made the Holy man's mouth water. The people were
equipped with the same long-handled spoons, but here the people were
well nourished and plump, laughing and talking.

The Holy man said, "I don't understand."

"It is simple," said the Lord. "It requires but one skill. You see
they have learned to feed each other, while the greedy think only
of themselves."

When Jesus died on the cross, He was thinking of you. Its estimated 93%
won't forward this. If you are one of the 7% who will, forward this
with the title "7%"

I'm in the 7% ~ Remember that I will always share my spoon with you.

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Religion Articles at LFCPlease read our articles on Religion at LookingForClues. Thanks!

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

A Short History Lesson - plz read

Here's another one of those emails that get passed around that are based on some truth but really exaggerate the facts! Snopes reports:

  • All schools in the UK have stopped teaching about the Holocaust in their history classes: False.
  • One history department in a northern UK city stopped teaching about the Holocaust because it wished to avoid confronting anti-Semitic sentiment and Holocaust denial among some Muslim pupils: True.
After you read the email below, be sure to visit the Snopes Story on this email for the rest of the story! The important thing to remember about this email is that the Holocaust DID happen and we must never forget it.

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It is a matter of history that when Supreme Commander of the Allied Forces, General Dwight Eisenhower, found the victims of the death camps he ordered all possible photographs to be taken, and for the German people from surrounding villages to be ushered through the camps and even made to bury the dead. He did this because he said in words to this effect: "Get it all on record now - get the films - get the witnesses - because somewhere down the track of history some bastard will get up and say that this never happened". "All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." Edmund Burke In Memorial. This week, the UK removed The Holocaust from its school curriculum because it "offended" the Muslim population which claims it never occurred. This is a frightening portent of the fear that is gripping the world and how easily each country is giving into it. It is now more than 60 years after the Second World War in Europe ended. This e-mail is being sent as a memorial chain, in memory of the six million Jews, 20 million Russians, 10 million Christians and 1,900 Catholic priests who were murdered, massacred, raped, burned, starved and humiliated while the German and Russian peoples looking the other way! Now, more than ever, with Iran, among others, claiming the Holocaust to be "a myth," it is imperative to make sure the world never forgets. This e-mail is intended to reach 40 million people worldwide! Be a link in the memorial chain and help distribute this around the world. How many years will it be before the attack on the World Trade Center "never happened" because it offends some Muslim in the U.S.?????? Don't just delete this. It will take a minute to pass this along.

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Religion Articles at LFCPlease read our articles on Religion at LookingForClues. Thanks!

Thursday, January 31, 2008

Good Clean Joke....

Religion Articles at LFCHere is a Christian/Computer related joke I recently received in my email. If you are looking for some serious religious reading, please browse our Religious Articles at LookingForClues.com; thanks!


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A little Christian humor

( This is one of the best clean jokes I've seen in awhile!)

Jesus and Satan were having an on-going argument about who was better on
the computer. They had been going at it for days, and frankly God was tired
of hearing all the bickering. Finally fed up, God said, "THAT'S IT! I have
had enough. I am going to set up a test that will run for two hours, and
from those results, I will judge who does the better job."

So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away.

They moused.
They faxed.
They e-mailed.
They e-mailed with attachments.
They downloaded.
They did spreadsheets!
They wrote reports.
They created labels and cards.
They created charts and graphs.
They did some genealogy reports.
They did every job known to man.

Jesus worked with heavenly efficiency and Satan was faster than hell. Then,
ten minutes before their time was up, lightning suddenly flashed across the
sky, thunder rolled, rain poured, and, of course, the power went off. Satan
stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known in the
underworld. Jesus just sighed.

Finally the electricity came back on, and each of them restarted their
computers. Satan started searching frantically, screaming:
"It's gone! It's all GONE! "I lost everything when the power went out!"
Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of his files from the past
two hours of work.

Satan observed this and became irate.
"Wait!" he screamed. "That's not fair! He cheated!
How come he has all his work and I don't have any?"
God just shrugged and said,


"JESUS SAVES"


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Please read our articles on Religion at LookingForClues. Thanks!

Friday, December 21, 2007

Letter from Jesus about Christmas

Dear Children,

It has come to my attention that many of you are upset that folks are
taking My name out of the season. Maybe you've forgotten that I wasn't
actually born during this time of the year and that it was some of your
predecessors who decided to celebrate My birthday on what was actually
a time of pagan festival. Although I do appreciate being remembered
anytime.

How I personally feel about this celebration can probably be most
easily understood by those of you who have been blessed with children
of your own. I don't care what you call the day. If you want to
celebrate My birth, just GET ALONG AND LOVE ONE ANOTHER.

Now, having said that let Me go on. If it bothers you that the town in
which you live doesn't allow a scene depicting My birth, then just get
rid of a couple of Santas and snowmen and put in a small Nativity scene
on your own front lawn. If all My followers did that there wouldn't be
any need for such a scene on the town square because there would be
many of them all around town.

Stop worrying about the fact that people are calling the tree a holiday
tree, instead of a Christmas tree. It was I who made all trees. You can
remember Me anytime you see any tree. Decorate a grape vine if you
wish: I actually spoke of that one in a teaching, explaining who I am
in relation to you and what each of our tasks were. If you have
forgotten that one, look up John 15: 1 - 8.

If you want to give Me a present in remembrance of My birth here is my
wish list. Choose something from it:

1. Instead of writing protest letters objecting to the way My birthday
is being celebrated, write letters of love and hope to soldiers away
from home. They are terribly afraid and lonely this time of year. I
know, they tell Me all the time.

2. Visit someone in a nursing home. You don't have to know them
personally. They just need to know that someone cares about them.

3. Instead of writing George complaining about the wording on the cards
his staff sent out this year, why don't you write and tell him that
you'll be praying for him and his family this year. Then follow up. It
will be nice hearing from you again.

4. Instead of giving your children a lot of gifts you can't afford and
they don't need, spend time with them. Tell them the story of My birt h,
and why I came to live with you down here. Hold them in your arms and
remind them that I love them.

5. Pick someone that has hurt you in the past and forgive him or her.

6. Did you know that someone in your town will attempt to take their
own life this season because they feel so alone and hopeless? Since
you don't know who that person is, try giving everyone you meet a warm
smile; it could make the difference.

7. Instead of nit picking about what the retailer in your town calls
the holiday, be patient with the people who work there. Give them a
warm smile and a kind word. Even if they aren't allowed to wish you a
'Merry Christmas' that doesn't keep you from wishing them one. Then
stop shopping there on Sunday. If the store didn't make so much money
on that day they'd close and let their employees spend the day at home
with their families.

8. If you really want to make a difference, support a missionary--
especially one who takes My love and Good News to those who have never
heard My name.

9. Here's a good one: There are individuals and whole families in your
town who not only will have no 'Christmas' tree, but neither will they
have any presents to give or receive. If you don't know them, buy some
food and a few gifts and give them to the Salvation Army or some other
charity which believes in Me and they will make the delivery for you.

10. Finally, if you want to make a statement about your belief in and
loyalty to Me, then behave like a Christian. Don't do things in secret
that you wouldn't do in My presence. Let people know by your actions
that you are one of mine.

Don't forget; I am God and can take care of Myself. Just love Me and do
what I have told you to do. I'll t ake care of all the rest. Check out
the list above and get to work; time is short. I'll help you, but the
ball is now in your court. And do have a most blessed Christmas with
all those whom you love and remember :

I LOVE YOU,
JESUS


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Please read our articles on Religion at LookingForClues. Thanks!

Thursday, December 20, 2007

GOD and Science

Here's an email that covers many elements of a good story - good versus evil, weak versus powerful, arrogance versus simple truth, and religion versus science. The story related in the email is a modification of one that has been circulating for years. Read more about emails like this on Snopes.com.

Here's the email, with my comments in GREEN.

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God vs. Science

A science professor begins his school year with a lecture to the
students, "Let me explain the problem science has with religion." The
atheist professor of philosophy pauses before his class and then asks
one of his new students to stand.

"You're a Christian, aren't you, son?"

"Yes sir," the student says.

"So you believe in God?"

"Absolutely."

"Is God good?"

"Sure! God's good."

"Is God all-powerful? Can God do anything?"

"Yes."

"Are you good or evil?"

"The Bible says I'm evil."

The professor grins knowingly. "Aha! The Bible!" He considers for a
moment. "Here's one for you. Let's say there's a sick person over
here and you can cure him. You can do it. Would you help him? Would
you try?"

"Yes sir, I would."

"So you're good...!"

"I wouldn't say that."

"But why not say that? You'd help a sick and maimed person if you
could. Most of us would if we could. But God doesn't."

The student does not answer, so the professor continues. "He doesn't,
does he? My brother was a Christian who died of cancer, even though
he prayed to Jesus to heal him. How is this Jesus good? Hmmm? Can you
answer that one?"

The student remains silent.

"No, you can't, can you?" the professor says. He takes a sip of water
from a glass on his desk to give the student time to relax.
"Let's start again, young fella. Is God good?"

"Er...yes," the student says.

"Is Satan good?"

The student doesn't hesitate on this one. "No."

"Then where does Satan come from?"

The student falters. "From God"

"That's right. God made Satan, didn't he? Tell me, son. Is there evil
in this world?"

"Yes, sir."

"Evil's everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything, correct?"

"Yes."

"So who created evil?" The professor continued, "If God created
everything, then God created evil, since evil exists, and according
to the principle that our works define who we are, then God is evil."

Again, the student has no answer. "Is there sickness? Immorality?
Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things, do they exist in this
world?"

The student squirms on his feet. "Yes."

"So who created them?"

The student does not answer again, so the professor repeats his
question. "Who created them?" There is still no answer. Suddenly the
lecturer breaks away to pace in front of the classroom. The class is
mesmerized.

The professor is basing his remarks on a concept known as the problem of evil. Essentially, it states that if God is all good, all knowing, and all powerful, then there should be no evil in the world. If God is all good, He must hate evil and desire it to be gone. If God is all knowing, He knows of every evil. If God is all powerful, He can eliminate evil. Since evil exists, God can not be all three things - all good, all knowing, and all powerful. This is just one of many arguments for and against the existance of God. Click this link for Books on the problem of evil. Click this link for Books on the existence of God.




"Tell me," he continues onto another student. "Do you
believe in Jesus Christ, son?"

The student's voice betrays him and cracks. "Yes, professor, I do."

The old man stops pacing. "Science says you have five senses you use
to identify and observe the world around you. Have you ever seen
Jesus?"

"No sir. I've never seen Him."

"Then tell us if you've ever heard your Jesus?"

"No, sir, I have not."

"Have you ever felt your Jesus, tasted your Jesus or smelt your
Jesus? Have you ever had any sensory perception of Jesus Christ, or
God for that matter?"

"No, sir, I'm afraid I haven't."

"Yet you still believe in him?"

"Yes."

"According to the rules of empirical, testable, demonstrable
protocol, science says your God doesn't exist. What do you say to
that, son?"

"Nothing," the student replies. "I only have my faith."

"Yes, faith," the professor repeats. "And that is the problem science
has with God. There is no evidence, only faith."

The student stands quietly for a moment, before asking a question of
His own. "Professor, is there such thing as heat?"

"Yes," the professor replies. "There's heat."

"And is there such a thing as cold?"

"Yes, son, there's cold too."

"No sir, there isn't."

The professor turns to face the student, obviously interested. The
room suddenly becomes very quiet. The student begins to explain. "You
can have lots of heat, even more heat, super-heat, mega-heat,
unlimited heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat, but we don't
have anything called 'cold'. We can hit up to 458 degrees below zero,
which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that. There is no
such thing as cold; otherwise we would be able to go colder than the
lowest -458 degrees."

"Every body or object is susceptible to study when it has or
transmits energy, and heat is what makes a body or matter have or
transmit energy. Absolute zero (-458 F) is the total absence of heat.
You see, sir, cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of
heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat we can measure in thermal units
because heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just
the absence of it."

Silence across the room. A pen drops somewhere in the classroom,
sounding like a hammer.

"What about darkness, professor. Is there such a thing as darkness?"

"Yes," the professor replies without hesitation. "What is night if it
isn't darkness?"

"You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is not something; it is the
abs ence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright
light, flashing light, but if you have no light constantly you have
nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? That's the meaning we use
to define the word."

"In reality, darkness isn't. If it were, you would be able to make
darkness darker, wouldn't you?"

The professor begins to smile at the student in front of him. This
will be a good semester. "So what point are you making, young man?"

"Yes, professor. My point is, your philosophical premise is flawed to
start with, and so your conclusion must also be flawed."

The professor's face cannot hide his surprise this time. "Flawed? Can
you explain how?"

"You are working on the premise of duality," the student
explains. "You argue that there is life and then there's death; a
good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as
something finite, something we can measure. Sir, science can't even
explain a thought."

"It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less
fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is
to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive
thing. Death is not the opposite of life, just the absence of it."

"Now tell me, professor. Do you teach your students that they evolved
from a monkey?"

"If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, young man,
yes, of course I do."

"Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?"

The professor begins to shake his head, still smiling, as he realizes
where the argument is going. A very good semester, indeed.

"Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and
cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you
not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you now not a scientist, but a
preacher?"

The class is in uproar. The student remains silent until the
commotion has subsided.

There is plenty of evidence for evolution and there has been observations of the process of evolution at work in an ongoing endeavor. Scientists teach whatever theories best fit the evidence. Theories are not hunches, as the word is used in common dialog. A theory is "A set of statements or principles devised to explain a group of facts or phenomena, especially one that has been repeatedly tested or is widely accepted and can be used to make predictions about natural phenomena." A preacher talks about matters of faith. Faith is "Belief that does not rest on logical proof or material evidence." Click this link for Books about Evolution

"To continue the point you were making earlier to the other student,
let me give you an example of what I mean."

The student looks around the room. "Is there anyone in the class who
has ever seen the professor's brain?" The class breaks out into
laughter.

"Is there anyone here who has ever heard the professor's brain, felt
the professor's brain, touched or smelt the professor's brain? No one
appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of
empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have
no brain, with all due respect, sir."

"So if science says you have no brain, how can we trust your
lectures, sir?"

Now the room is silent. The professor just stares at the student, his
face unreadable.

The brain can be empirically studied. Scientists use fMRIs (brain scans) to understand what parts of the brain are used in various mental activities such as speech, vision, and even thought and Glossolalia (speaking in tongues). The professor clearly has a brain and it can even be felt if he agrees to brain surgery.

Finally, after what seems an eternity, the old man answers. "I guess
you'll have to take them on faith."

"Now, you accept that there is faith, and, in fact, faith exists with
life," the student continues. "Now, sir, is there such a thing as
evil?"

Now uncertain, the professor responds, "Of course, there is. We see
it everyday. It is in the daily example of man's inhumanity to man.
It is in the multitude of crime and violence everywhere in the world.
These manifestations are nothing else but evil."

To this the student replied, "Evil does not exist sir, or at least it
does not exist unto itself. Evil is simply the absence of God. It is
just like darkness and cold, a word that man has created to describe
the absence of God. God did not create evil. Evil is the result of
what happens when man does not have God's love present in his heart.
It's like the cold that comes when there is no heat or the darkness
that comes when there is no light."

The professor sat down.

Evil can also result from "acts of God" like hurricanes, tsunamis, and earthquakes; things that have nothing to do with man.

If you read it all the way through and had a smile on your face when
you finished, mail to your friends and family with the title: God and Science.

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Please read our articles on Religion at LookingForClues. Thanks!