Monday, October 31, 2011

Keep the gray matter active


Keep the gray matter active

1. Johnny's mother had three children. The first child was named April. The second child was named May. What was the third child's name?

2. There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall and he wears size 13 sneakers. What does he weigh?

3. Before Mt. Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain in the world?

4. How much dirt is there in a hole that measures two feet by three feet by four feet?

5. What word in the English Language is always spelled incorrectly?

6. Billy was born on December 28th, yet his birthday is always in the summer. How is this possible?

7. In California, you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg. Why not?

8. What was the President's Name in 1975?

9. If you were running a race, and you passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in n ow?

10. Which is correct to say, "The yolk of the egg are white" or "The yolk of the egg is white"?

11. If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the other field, how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in another field?








Here are the Answers

1. Johnny's mother had three children. The first child was named April. The second child was named May. What was the third child's name?

Answer: Johnny, of course.

2. There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall, and he wears size 13 sneakers. What does he weigh?

Answer: Meat.

3. Before Mt. Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain in the world?

Answer: Mt. Everest; it just wasn't discovered yet. [You're not very good at this, are you?]

4. How much dirt is there in a hole that measures two feet by three feet by four feet?

Answer: There is no dirt in a hole.

5. What word in the English Language is always spelled incorrectly?

Answer: Incorrectly

6. Billy was born on December 28th, yet her birthday is always in the summer. How is this possible?

Answer: Billy lives in the Southern Hemisphere

7. In California, you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg. Why not?

Answer: You can't take pictures with a wooden leg. You need a camera to take pictures.

8. What was the President's Name in 1975?

Answer: Same as is it now - Barack Obama [Oh, come on ....]

9. If you were running a race, and you passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in now?

Answer: You would be in 2nd. Well, you passed the person in second place, not first.

10. Which is correct to say, "The yolk of the egg are white" or "The yolk of the egg is white"?

Answer: Neither, the yolk of the egg is yellow [Duh]

11. If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the other field, how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in another field?

Answer: One. If he combines all of his haystacks, they all become one big stack.

You can go back to sleep now ....

Friday, October 21, 2011

Chuckle

This is a quick and funny joke for you all, that I just got in my email inbox yesterday. Enjoy! If you like it, or any other email posted on this site, please share it with your friends on Twitter, FaceBook, Tumblr, etc. Thanks!

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One winter morning at breakfast a couple was listening to the radio.

They heard the announcer say, "We are going to have 8-10 inches of snow

today. You must park your car on the even-numbered side of the street, so

the snowplow can get through." The wife went out and moved her car.

A week later while they are eating breakfast, the radio

announcer said, "We are expecting 10-12 inches of snow today, you will

need to move your car to the odd-numbered side of the street so the

snowplow can get through." So the wife went out and moved her car again.

The next week, while they were eating breakfast, the radio

announcer said, "We are expecting 12-14 inches of snow today and you must

park..." Then the power went off! The wife was very upset. With a worried

look on her face she said, "Honey, I don't know what to do. Which side of

the street am I supposed to park on?"

With the love and understanding in his voice that all men who are married to

blondes exhibit, her husband said,

"Why don't you just leave it in the garage this time."

Friday, October 7, 2011

A cat and dolphins, the LONG version

Been around before but worth a second look.

This is a video of a house cat on a boat, and a few dolphins in the water interacting.

The dolphin pets the cat with its snout. The cat kisses the dolphin and touches the side of its snout with its paw. Very cute animal video for cat lovers and dolphin lovers too!



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